Then smiled.
I wasn’t ready.
***
That year, I decided her birthday deserved something special.
I walked into a children’s toy store carrying absolutely no idea what I was looking for.
Shelves overflowed with toys, and I had no idea where to start.
A cheerful voice interrupted my panic.
“Shopping for someone important?”
I had no idea where to start.
I turned.
Claire stood behind the counter wearing a blue apron with embroidered stars across the pocket.
“My daughter.”
“How old?”
“Two.”
Claire looked toward Ari, who had wrapped both arms around my leg.
“How old?”
Instead of speaking to her directly, Claire crouched behind the checkout counter.
A floppy stuffed rabbit slowly peeked over the edge.
It looked left. Then right.
Then it whispered loudly enough for Ari to hear.
“I don’t think anybody can see me.”
The rabbit slowly spun around before falling dramatically onto the floor.
Ari giggled.
It looked left. Then right.
The rabbit stood up again.
“I meant to do that.”
Another giggle.
Within two minutes, Ari was making the rabbit hop across the counter herself.
Claire looked at me and smiled.
“There she is!”
Somehow Claire had already noticed something about my daughter that most people missed.
That Ari didn’t need attention. She needed patience.
“There she is!”
Before I left, Claire tucked a tiny sticker shaped like a rainbow into Ari’s shopping bag.
“For the birthday girl.”
Ari hugged the bag all the way home.
***
A week later I returned because Ari insisted the rabbit probably missed us.
Claire laughed. “I was wondering if the rabbit would ever see his friend again.”
“For the birthday girl.”
Coffee turned into dinners.
Dinners became weekend walks.
Weekend walks slowly became something neither of us wanted to end.
On our third date, I told Claire about Sarah.
Everything.
Even the guilt I still carried every single morning.
I told Claire about Sarah.
When I finished, she reached across the table.
“You don’t have to stop loving Sarah.”
I looked at her.
“I don’t?”
She smiled sadly. “Love doesn’t work that way, Paxton.”
Nobody had ever said that before.
Most people told me it was time to move on.
“You don’t have to stop loving Sarah.”
Claire never used those words.
