And during that time, I made the worst decision of my life.
I convinced myself that disappearing would be easier.
For everyone.
Especially my baby.
I told Daniel I didn’t want him involved.
I told him I had changed my mind.
I told him he should move on.
But that wasn’t the truth.
The truth was that I was scared he would take my daughter away.
So I made sure he couldn’t.
I signed papers.
I moved.
I changed numbers.
And when people asked about Iris’s father…
I said he was gone.
I never said dead.
But I never corrected anyone when they assumed it.
And eventually, the lie became bigger than me.
“I loved him.”
My voice broke.
I hadn’t even realized I was crying.
“I loved your father.”
Iris stared at me.
“Then why?”
The question came immediately.
No hesitation.
“Why did you hide me from him?”
I had no answer that sounded good.
Because there wasn’t one.
“I was scared.”
Her face changed.
Not anger.
Disappointment.
“You were scared?”
I nodded.
“I thought I was protecting you.”
She wiped her cheek.
“You don’t get to decide that alone.”
That sentence hurt because it was exactly what I needed to hear.
“I know.”
“No, Mom.”
Her voice became stronger.
“You don’t know.”
She pointed toward Ryan.
“You made choices for him too.”
Ryan looked down.
And I realized something.
He wasn’t just angry because he lost a father.
He was angry because he lost a sister.
