—I was ashamed to think that my son could have been wrong.
—And he preferred to believe that I was just some random woman.
Cry.
-Yeah.
I didn’t hug her.
But I let him see his grandchildren.
With limits.
Boundaries are a form of peace that I didn’t know before.
Diego visits the children three times a week.
She learned to change diapers.
Bad at the beginning.
He learned that Nicolás calms down with white noise and that Emilia hates socks. He learned that being a father isn’t about crying during ultrasounds, but about arriving on time with formula at ten o’clock at night.
Sometimes he looks at me with that sadness of a man who wishes he could turn back time.
I don’t give him false hope.
Nor poison.
Only the truth.
“Do the right thing with them,” I tell him. “You’re already too late with me.”
One afternoon, while the babies were sleeping, she asked me:
—Do you hate me?
I thought about it.
-No.
He seemed relieved.
Until I added:
—But I don’t trust you anymore. And love without trust isn’t a home. It’s a decorated ruin.
He did not respond.
Today Nicolás and Emilia are one year old.
They walk around holding onto the furniture, they steal toys and laugh as if they came into the world to mock everything that tried to break us.
I work from home, I don’t sleep much, I don’t style my hair well, and I almost always drink cold coffee.Alcoholic Beverages
But when I see them sleeping, I understand something:
